Wednesday, January 31, 2007

a great loss

The unsinkable Molly Ivins passed away today. Her voice will be sorely missed.

OpEd that confirms that cousins should not marry cousins.

(from the letter to the editor, Austin American Statesman)

On the other hand . . . Being a conservative Republican, it would be difficult enough to have a liberal Democrat as president, but to have a president whose middle name is Hussein and has absolutely no experience would make me very uncomfortable.


I guess she didn't feel comfortable mentioning his skin color, too...

but thanks for playing...

Joe Biden (D-Clueless) on Barack Obama:

“I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy... I mean, that’s a storybook, man.”

That oughta lock up the "black Americans who enjoy being treated with smug condescension" demographic.

Mr. Biden, welcome to "the Great Egress."
(apologies to P.T. Barnum)

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

to quote Bender: "darn universe!"

As if this time of year wasn't difficult enough for space enthusiasts, what with the anniversaries of the Apollo I fire that took place January 27th, 1967, the Challenger explosion which occurred January 28th, 1986, and the Columbia breaking up during re-entry on February 1st of 2003, more bad news came out today.

The Advanced Camera for Surveys on the Hubble Space Telescope is out of order, and is not expected to be able to be returned to any better than about one-third of its previous capabilities. There is a mission planned to service the telescope in 2008, but with our ageing shuttle fleet that is anything but guaranteed, so the ACS may never function again.

If you don't know what the Advanced Camera for Surveys is by name, you know it by reputation. It is the camera system (one of several different types of cameras on board) that is responsible for all of the incredible space photographs that many of you have probably used for screensavers before.

We can't bring those seventeen brave astronauts back, but we can fix the Advanced Camera for Surveys. Contact your congressional representatives and urge them to increase funding for NASA to fix this incredible resource for exploring and learning about the universe in which we live.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Friday cat-blogging

Freeloader edition:

Mr. Tweedy

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

urethra, I have found it!

Many cable-news watchers have wondered why little Tucker Carlson wears a bow tie.

I know the truth.

It's because the regular ties would get sucked into the bowl when he was getting one of his many daily "swirlies" during his school years.

all we are say-ing...


"Bush asks to give war a chance",23739,21113879-952,00.html

It's sort of like "right-to-life," only for wars.

don't it figure

John Kerry announces he will not be a candidate in the 2008 presidential contest and gives a barnburning speech before Congress, the exact speech that he needed to give in 2004 and the exact kind of courage and steadfastness that he should have displayed then.

Mr. Kerry, thank you, you will continue to be a better and better Senator for this country and will likely take over the Ted Kennedy position on the team someday and be a positive force on the United States with a great place in history.

However, the occasion, timing, and content of this great speech today demonstrates exactly why you are not the president now and should never strive to become president in the future.

You are a great American, do not rise to the level of your incompetence. We've already got one of those.

driving to Mars in hydrogen cars

Let's nip this new one in the bud.

The president was not "conciliatory" and "gracious" in last night's Sorry State of the Union address.

Sure, he shook Nancy Pelosi's hand, he grinned like a twelve-year-old boy at her, he talked about working "together," but it was the charade of a practiced con man trying to put his mark at ease after the mark had noticed that a few things about his actions don't quite fit with his story. He was ingratiating.

I would like to point out that his statistics were lies, his wish-list was bullshit, and none of the grandiose legacy-inducing pipe dreams that he spun out to us in forty-nine interminable minutes will ever come to pass.

Just like the other promises he's made in his previous exercises in Tom Swift daydreaming.

questions without answers

"We will eliminate the federal deficit in five years without raising taxes."

"We will sell you a brand-new Ferrari without charging a penny more than your monthly payments on your '89 Taurus."

How is it that the people of this country calmly accept one of these statements despite its obvious absurdity, yet would want the person saying the other one to be arrested as a con man? Is America really that stupid? If it is, we've already lost and we deserve any misfortune that befalls us.

FOAD, Mr. President

"Democrat" majority?

Fuck you, George Bush. You're a small, rude, petty and pathetic excuse for a man. That will forever be your legacy.

I knew I'd seen him before...

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

yet another

After nearly four years, I still can't seem to get a clear determination of whether we are at war WITH Iraq or FOR Iraq, since it seems that we are both, depending on which one is most politically helpful for this administration at any particular moment. Anyone got a better handle on that?

stamp out a bigot

history in the making

Happy Birthday to the Frisbee flying disc, fifty years old today. Named after the pie pans that the Frisby pie company used to bake and sell their pies in, the Frisbee is one of the toys that will probably never die.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Unstoppable Ignorance

Once again, George Bush, "The decider", is deciding to ignore the advice of those in the know, and the will of the people. In spite of his constant promises to "Listen to the Generals in the field", he is instead listening to a small minority that believes that increasing troop strength in Iraq is the right strategy. Generals Abizaid and Casey, both opponents of the idea, have been replaced. The Baker-Hamilton report has been ignored. The clear wishes of the majority of the electorate have been dismissed, and Bush has declared that Congress cannot stop him. As if the incredible hubris were not enough, the problem is that Bush and team have not been right about ONE SINGLE THING in Iraq. They were wrong about the WMD. They were wrong about ties to Al Qaeda. They were wrong about nukes from Africa. They were wrong about the duration. They were wrong about the costs. They were wrong about how we would be received. They were wrong about the strength of the insurgency. They were wrong about the balance between military and political solutions. Yet in spite of all this, Bush still believes he stands virtually alone in knowing the right solution. Sad thing is, he's right about one thing - Nobody can stop him.

seeds of destruction

Activist liberals need to stay on top of the subliminal propaganda of the wrong-wingers and tirelessly work to counteract it, because they are already pulling out all of the stops. The growing theme of the last couple of weeks has been that it might not be a good idea to elect Hillary Clinton in 2008 because that would mean that if she served for two terms that would mean that Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton was the sequence of presidents for twenty-eight years, and that was just too "dynastic." Funny thing is, I can't seem to recall any of these people objecting to the Bush part of this "dynastic" succession. This is nothing but a subtle play to discourage people from even considering Hillary Clinton for president. Remember, it wasn't until we were presented with the reality of Senator Clinton running that the whole idea struck the people who are pushing this story as unseemly, and of course, we are all supposed to know that they are only thinking of the well-being of the United States.

The flaw in the logic that is being carefully obscured is that of the Bush-Clinton-Bush span, the twelve years under the Bushes were disasters (or will have been) but the eight years of Clinton were a golden period of peace and prosperity. Upon examining the meme, it seems to me the people who are pushing it are doing some very dishonest conflation and that this meme is a close relative of the "Democrats should be bipartisan" whining that has been playing on an infinite loop since the elections.

You see, if you look at it from a slightly different direction it looks like that after the first Bush disaster a Clinton was the best antidote.

Perhaps another Clinton is the best antidote for this Bush as well.

She sure couldn't be any worse.

(Personally, I'd like to see an Ewards/Webb ticket.)


I decided I would go ahead and rebut the State of the Union cheer that the most powerful cheerleader in the world will offer us tomorrow night, so here it is.

This man ruined every business venture he led. He ran the state of Texas into the ground. He came into office under dubious circumstances, and there is significant evidence of tampered elections since he has been in office. He ignored intelligence warnings about bin Laden. He peed himself in a Florida classroom and couldn't get up for seven minutes while our fellow citizens burned to death and jumped out of skyscrapers. He has so far failed to catch the perpetrator. He has permitted Afghanistan to slide back into the hands of the Taliban by pursuing a war on a different country with no cause and no justification. He has overseen the abysmal mishandling of that needless war. He let a major American city drown and hundreds of thousands of our citizens to become refugees despite warnings. He has trodden upon the Constitution he swore to uphold. He has made the incredibly wealthy prosper and the rest of us fall back. He has run up historically enormous deficits, bills that when come due may bankrupt this country. He was not truthful about his service to the country. He has denigrated decorated veterans on numerous occasions. He treats solid science as an equal to superstitious beliefs. He shows himself on all turns to be self-serving and woefully ignorant. He demands loyalty from his underlings, and permits them to become his scapegoats when they want loyalty from him. He has packed the judicial branch of the nation with unqualified cronies. He has presided over the most corrupt political party this country has ever seen. When confronted with evidence of his and his administrations misdeeds, he resorts to straw men and outright lies. He governs through pageant and misdirection rather than through reasoned conclusion and noble deed. He is, without a doubt, the greatest huckster and scoundrel to ever sully the office of President of the United States of America.

And we are supposed to listen to a word that he says?

In your own words, Mr. Bush:

"There's an old saying in Tennessee. I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee, that says, fool me once.."


"... shame on..."


"shame on you..."


"...well, if y're fooled, ya, ya can't get fooled again."

I agree, Mr. Bush, I agree.

the season for reason

Every once in a while, I don't feel so alone:

this can't end well

On yesterday's "FOX News Sunday," FOX's Juan Williams indicated that there was legitimate concern about Barack Obama caused by his father's Muslim belief. Said Williams:

"And I think in terms of Obama and race, I still think that there's -- and don't forget the idea that, you know, he comes from a father who was a Muslim and all that. I mean, I think that, given that we're at war with Muslim extremists, that presents a problem."

Really? That presents a problem? I don't recall that being a problem in World War II. It seems to me that following that logic that if we were at war with the christian extremists Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini and their christian countries, then we should have been looking for a leader who was, I dunno, Muslim or something.

FOX News. All bullshit, all the time.

Friday, January 19, 2007

party of one

Joe Lieberman, (Turncoat, Connecticut) has announced that he will filibuster WITH the Republicans to support the defective-in-chief's escalation of the fiasco in Iraq.

How much does it take for the Democratic Party to decide enough is enough and kick him out in the most public way possible? They seem to think that if they hedge their bets that they might be able to get him to cooperate, but it has yet to turn out that way.

Eliminate Lieberman. Let the thugs have him. They deserve him.

Although, they probably understand that he won't be any more trustworthy with them and would never permit him to join.

Cons know cons.

I hate to be a pest, but...

Help me sort this out. The president says that he isn't bound by actions of Congress because he has taken up the mantle of the "commander-in-chief," and as such he is permitted to take extraordinary steps since the commander-in-chief has greater latitude of choices than the president. The president becomes the commander-in-chief under the auspices of a congressional Declaration of War. However, despite the frequent use of the phrase "War on Terror," there has been no Declaration of War. So, how then is this president justified in claiming the powers of the commander-in-chief?

Friday cat-blogging

I do not mean to offend the owner, but this is feline abuse.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

victory is... ours!

Our decider-in-chief has stated on many occasions that success in Iraq would mean that a democratic government similar to that of the United States was finally in power.

And what appears in the news today but Iraq president Nouri Al-Maliki, responding to Condoleezza Rice's remarks about the lack of control his government had in the country, saying that the current Iraqi government was living "on borrowed time."

"I believe that such statements give moral boosts to the terrorists and push them towards making an extra effort and making them believe that they have defeated the American administration, but I can tell you that they haven't defeated the Iraqi government."

Boy, they learn fast, don't they? That sounds exactly like the line that dubya and his crew have been peddling the last several years.

It seems to me that we have succeeded in installing a government exactly like the one we have here in the United States. That means we have won. We can bring our troops home with "Mission Accomplished" banners.

Smells like victory, indeed.

good news and...

The presidunce has recently been under pressure to take steps to try to halt the progress of global warming caused by human activities. The administration seems to think that the tactic of telling us that because they have done enough to slow the rate of increase of carbon emissions that it somehow constitutes praiseworthy and adequate results, sufficient enough to not take any further steps.

It's kind of like having the doctor tell you that there is good news and that your terminal cancer is not growing quite as fast as it was.

Of course, the downside of having those extra few weeks or months to live is that they only extend your agony. Your fate is no less inevitable by being somewhat delayed.

four thousand dollars

According to CNN, the current total cost for the Blunder in Baghdad is 1.2 trillion dollars, which includes all of the coming costs for equipment repair and replacement that will be necessary. That means that the government has expended four thousand dollars for each and every person of the three hundred million residents of the United States.

That also factors out to an expenditure of forty-six thousand dollars for each individual in the entire country of Iraq.

And it's nowhere near over yet. Every month is still generating over eight billion dollars additional spending, and the Bush/McCain/Lieberman "surge" is going to drive the still higher.

Untold billions of these dollars already spent are entirely unaccounted for.

Do you really think we can afford to extend this administration the benefit of any more doubts?

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

a follow-up, please?

I'd also like for somebody to explain to me why it is that in order to help "heal" the divisions in the country of Iraq, it was urgent that Saddam Hussein be publicly lynched in circumstances that echo KKK murders from the twentieth century, while to heal the divisions in the United States that we need to avoid "playing the blame game" in favor of "bipartisanship" (which was maliciously withheld from the liberal majority of this country for the last six years) and for "forgiveness" and "moving forward?" Is there any reason why seeing the members of this administration dancing the Spandau ballet for their crimes wouldn't be as effective here as it was held to be in Iraq?

Speaking of Cabin Fever

Quinn wants me to fix the weather.


George W. Bush:

“Sometimes you’re the commander-in-chief, sometimes you’re the educator-in-chief, and a lot of times you’re both when it comes to war.”


Things are even more bleak than I thought...

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

cabin fever

A couple of days of not going outside to play and they've taken to sitting in front of our monitors if we're at our desks, sitting in our laps if we're using our laptops, or walking over the keyboards. Or taking over our chairs. They've been running over the furniture, the kitchen counters; up and down the hall--riding each other like jockies in a quarter mile race, and sprawling across the clean (warm) laundry.

We've got to get out of this cold snap and ice/snow storm before they drive us mad.

an innocent question

I'm wondering if anyone can tell me in what way a President who ignores the will of the people and the demands of Congress and sends additional troops to Iraq does not constitute taxation without representation?

Monday, January 15, 2007

a heapin' helpin' o' dignity

Don't it make ya proud ta be on dubya's team?

"Saddam Hussein’s half brother and the former chief of Iraq’s Revolutionary Court were both hanged before dawn Monday, but the half-brother's head was severed by the noose — leading to outrage from Sunnis who claim the body was mutilated."

oxymoron of the day

"Dignified hanging."

It's sort of like "tender rape."

Sunday, January 14, 2007

a moment of pleasure

Rome is still the best television show in the world. Ever.

Welcome back.

The Good Ole USA

What would you call a country in which one man can defy the will of three quarters of the population? Where he can defy the will of his lawmakers? Where he can wiretap whomever he wants? Where he can open mail at his discretion? Where he can tap into financial records without legal justification. Where he can imprison anyone he wants, with no evidence and no access to legal protection, for an indefinite period? Some people would call this a dictatorship. I call it the United States.


It saddens me that every single day we find out several more appalling things about our government and the dirty deeds being done under this administration. Each day we learn something new about the havoc they are wreaking with our constitution, our economy, our lives and our environment. Each day we read another article that makes us cringe.

I find it difficult to get through one day without the feeling that the government of the people, by the people and for the people is now about government of the people by and for a handful of deliberate and deceitful fools. After the mid-terms I was hopeful but I think our collective assessment before the election, that it would be too little too late, that we had passed the point of no return with this hell-in-a-handbasket administration, was probably on the mark.

The constitution is shredded and under the feet of one of the worlds most brazen and emboldened terrorists and he is our president.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Beverly Hills cop

Michael Jackson just settled a suit that had been filed against him by a Beverly Hills pharmacy for slightly less than one hundred and two thousand dollars of unpaid bills. It seems that since the middle of 2005, he has had his prescriptions delivered by the pharmacy but has not paid for them. The suit was filed earlier this week, and Jackson just settled the tab with the pharmacy today, so presumably the suit will be withdrawn.

While it's good that Jackson took care of the outstanding bill, it can't help but make me wonder one thing. Why this particular bill? Why so fast? It has been well-documented that Michael owes a lot of people a lot of money, that there are other suits and complaints against him for past-due bills, and rumors have abounded for a couple of years that he has been spending his vast fortune at a profligate pace, enough to cause concerns about his solvency.

Yet, he took care of this bill almost as soon as the matter was reported in the news.

Perhaps he doesn't want anyone else to ask the question I have been wondering about since I heard this story in the news a couple of days ago. How does one run up a prescription drug bill of $101,926.66 in one and a half years? How many different prescriptions does that represent? Is he copping drugs to use recreationally or is he extremely ill? I mean, seriously, that is either a Limbaugh-sized addiction problem or a major health concern like cancer or AIDS. So, the story is far from over and the next thing to watch for is whether or not area law enforcement looks into this situation.

Michael might be seeing the inside of another jail with "doody and feces" on the walls soon.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Nostradoofus speaks

The fight for the Republican ticket in 2008 will be between the campaigns of McCain/Lieberman and Giuliani/Gingrich.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

the other boot

It just occurred to me that the 2007 State of the Union address is in twelve days, scheduled for January 23rd. With nearly two weeks for the citizens of this country to stew over Bush's flagrant disregard for their intent as expressed in the November elections and with the news that we have, in violation of all international law, stormed an Iranian embassy and taken Iranis prisoner, the situation is likely going to be extremely dicey twelve days from now.

This is going to be the most interesting State of the Union address ever.

And no, I'm not expressing Bush-hating glee. It gives me no joy whatsoever that we are reaping the completely avoidable harvest we have let this malevolent and incompetent buffoon sow. With the money spent and still to be spent on this hideously wrongful war, we could have completely funded Social Security centuries into the future, provided universal health care for every single human in this country, rebuilt New Orleans and put it back on its feet, constructed a new towering rebuke to bin Laden standing on the still-naked site of the World Trade Center, invested in alternative energy, established port security, invested in stem-cell research to lengthen and improve our lives, and sent men to Mars, all instead of enriching Halliburton cronies and petroleum pirates. We have no right to whine, we deserve the consequences of improper and immoral actions.

Hopefully, this will be a learning experience for our nation.

goodbye, Mockingbird Lane

RIP Yvonne DeCarlo, aka Lily Munster. Farewell, prototypical Transylvanian MILF, you were sort of the Goth June Lockhart. You will live forever as the patient and accepting wife of the irrepressible Herman.

Morticia was the real hottie, though.

yadda yadda yadda

...THAT is a "plan?"

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

I'm an ijut.

Okay, I'm an ijut.

"The situation in Iraq is unacceptable to the American people — and it is unacceptable to me. Our troops in Iraq have fought bravely. They have done everything we have asked them to do. Where mistakes have been made, the responsibility rests with me."

SO, give me another twenty thousand of your children...

Everybody Must Get Stones

Teddy has 'em... Kennedy fights 'immense new mistake'

Tony has 'em... Britain will cut troop levels in Iraq by almost 3,000 (Reuters)

Even Yvette Clark has 'em: New NY lawmakers weigh Iraq troop increase

It's time to "just say no to the dope"

"if we lose this war"

I just saw Pat Buchanan (who really showed how vile he is on last night's Scarborough show) just float the idea that he agrees with the president and most of the Kool-Aid guzzlers that "if we lose this war, it will be catastrophic for the United States."


And you know what, Pat? Anybody that loses a fight that THEY STARTED actually deserves to suffer the consequences. They really deserve to lose it. Are you saying that we should get a pass and not have to because some misled folks think this war was started in good faith? I don't like seeing my country lose lives, capital, respect, and moral authority and suffer the consequences of our misadventure in the Middle East, but it is GEORGE W. BUSH'S FAULT as well as that of everybody who assisted him. Those of us who were right all along will suffer along with the rest through no fault of our own. People like Bush and Buchanan and Cheney and Rumsfeld and Rove - they won't suffer at all.

Unless of course, they all finally get tried as the war criminals they are.

a Jones Alley exclusive!

If you want to save some time and not have to watch the president's speech tonight, here it is:

"This is the last time I'm telling you 'for the last time!'"

civility in action

A multitude of right-wingers, both individuals and organizations, have been ruthlessly chiding the Democrats for their lack of "civility" and decrying the need for the country to "return" (RETURN?) to genteel bipartisanship. Their crocodile tears are poisoned, infected urine. Just this morning, FOX "News" anchor Gretchen Carlson referred to Senator Edward Kennedy as "a hostile enemy right here on the home front" in an interview with White House spokesman Dan Bartlett. To his credit, Bartlett somewhat repudiated that hideous insult.

If this incident doesn't demonstrate why we must NEVER trust these people again, I don't know what does. The neocon christianist right needs to be ground out of existence forever. I disdain violence, but these people must be utterly crushed, never to rise to power again.

I will never again call for unity. It is time for the liberals in this country to publicly claim the birthright of the United States of America, the country which was conceived and born in the name of liberalism. Conservative principles are fine, and I actually have many, but the fascist right has repeatedly violated the very foundations of the Constitution time and time again, and they must be forcibly ejected from the game once and for all. It is time to make them fear liberals, to make them flee this country to find a place where they can establish their own new Nazi state for us to eradicate.

Watch this hideous segment (link at bottom of post) that utterly reveals the treacherous and deceitful nature of the right. They do not want comity and collegiality, they do not want consensus and cooperation, they do not want bipartisanship, they are merely laying in wait and lying through their teeth about their motives as they marshall their forces and develop a new plan to conquer this country and to form it in their own unconstitutional image.

They are predators.

They must not be trusted.

They must never be given the benefit of the doubt.

You see, the simple problem is that the neocon christianists believe in only one strategy: subjugation. Somebody must be on top. It's the only existence they understand. If we have "conversations" and "dialogs" with them, it just reinforces their views of liberals as "girly men" (and women) and makes them think they are capable of dominating us, which gives them constant incentive to try.

We are caught in the trap of their own worldview. If we win and use our privilege to shape the nation, we are being partisan and exclusionary. If we take the bait and negotiate with them, we are pussies, cattle to be slaughtered, marks to be hustled. Remember the permanent Republican majority thing they were convinced was going to be the new world order? So, there's only one recourse.

Their guiding principles must be constitutionally outlawed in clear, unambiguous terms. Anyone then violating the Constitution by acting on the those principles must be prosecuted the full extent of the law and receive the harshest punishments available under the rule of law.

The basic principles upon which this nation was founded are not negotiable and are not up for debate. The neocon christianists must be ruthlessly dominated and then destroyed, As much as I hate the conclusion, it is the only language that they understand, and the only way this will ever stop.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

banzai, buckaroo...

The U.S.S. Newport News, an American nuclear attack submarine, collided with the Japanese oil tanker Mogamigawa in the Straits of Hormuz between the Arabian Gulf and the Gulf of Hormuz. This comes not quite six years after the U.S.S. Greenville collided with and sank the Japanese fishing vessel Ehime Maru off the Hawaiian Islands.

I predict that the right wing will start hollering for regime change in Japan now that they are obviously testing some sort of advance submarine-attracting magnet on our navy.

Monday, January 08, 2007

case closed

The source of the noxious chemical leak in Sugarland, Texas? Simple:

if it wasn't already obvious

"Iraq's massive oil reserves, the third-largest in the world, are about to be thrown open for large-scale exploitation by Western oil companies under a controversial law which is expected to come before the Iraqi parliament within days.

The US government has been involved in drawing up the law, a draft of which has been seen by The Independent on Sunday. It would give big oil companies such as BP, Shell and Exxon 30-year contracts to extract Iraqi crude and allow the first large-scale operation of foreign oil interests in the country since the industry was nationalised in 1972."

Once again, thank goodness the adults are in charge. The companies are not only getting to exploit Iraq, they are being granted practically usurious terms under which to do it.

Read the rest of the article:

that new-war smell

Today, in quick succession, we were treated to news orgies about a bad odor in New York and New Jersey (and this is news how?) and a bomb threat on a cruise ship in Miami, a chemical leak in Texas, and a gas leak in Missouri. Oh, and lest we forget, our failure-in-chief will be rolling out his plan for a "surge" in Iraq on Wednesday night.

Sounds to me like somebody is turning up the "FEAR" knob in anticipation of a shiny new war against Iran! Any guesses as to how much longer we have to wait for some Orange Alerts?

Saturday, January 06, 2007

the adults in charge

"KUWAIT CITY: A well-known Kuwaiti businessman is negotiating hard to own the noose which hung ousted Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein to death. Reliable sources say the businessman's representatives have asked the Iraqi Ministry of Interior Affairs to sell the rope to them. The businessman is apparently ready to pay any amount of money for the noose.

According to sources, it is with Shiite leader Muqtada Al-Sadr and the businessman's representatives are negotiating with him. The businessman had earlier purchased the vandalized statue of Saddam Hussein which stood at Al-Firdous Square in Baghdad.

Sources say he obtained the statue through American representatives and exhibits the head of the statue in his diwaniya (sitting room). "

(emphasis mine)

Currier and Ives, Baghdad edition

The first paragraph of David Sanger's New York Times article today:

"President Bush’s new Iraq strategy calls for a rapid influx of forces that could add as many as 20,000 American combat troops to Baghdad, supplemented with a jobs program costing as much as $1 billion intended to employ Iraqis in projects including painting schools and cleaning streets, according to American officials who are piecing together the last parts of the initiative."

That silly Baker Group, they thought this Iraq thing was so complex. I mean, come on, over a hundred pages? Our leader has pared it right down to the essentials, and is finally showing us the true genius he has been apparently holding in abeyance these last several years.

Painting the schools and cleaning the streets. What a delightfully non-threatening and bucolic image. It's going to be so simple to finally fix this Iraq situation now that the renaissance man in the White House has finally "listened" to advice. The plan is simple. After our neighborly "surge" of killing people, all we have to do is to put all of the Iraqis left, the ones who will, of course, love us and greet us as liberators - all we have to do is to put them to work paintin' the schools and cleanin' the streets, and we will finally have the victory - er, sorry - the "Victry" that his highness has been assuring us is just around the corner.

The Stormin' Norman Rockwellization of Iraq is finally nigh. Although, I think that the Decider has missed a couple of other important jobs that will help accomplish The Mission.

We need to also hire Iraqis to fluff the throw pillows on every couch in Iraq, to repair all of the screen doors, and to check the tires on all of their cars and make sure they are inflated to the proper pressure. And then give each of them a pony.

It's the only way we can be sure.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

a new day is dawning

Hope has finally reawakened in the United States.

Hope's first words were "what the fuck have those idiots in office done to this country?"

Welcome back, Hope. We've missed you. Now put on your work clothes, we have some serious mucking of the stables ahead of us...

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

for it before they were against it

It seems the Republicans are getting all worked up over the unfairness of having Democrats in control of Congress. Ray Blount and Denny Hastert, among others, have recently issued whiny statements about how the Democrats are shutting them out, seemingly forgetting that they have self-righteously done the same thing to Democrats for the last six years while they ran the country and the world into ruin.

Funny, they really should have thought of that when they were getting all cocky and saying things like this:

"Once the minority of House and Senate are comfortable in their minority status, they will have no problem socializing with the Republicans. Any farmer will tell you that certain animals run around and are unpleasant, but when they've been fixed, then they are happy and sedate. They are contented and cheerful. They don't go around peeing on the furniture and such."

Any farmer will also tell you that if an animal is too unpleasant, sometimes the only way to solve the problem is by regretfully putting them to sleep...

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

two reasons to be happier

1. George W. Bush now has less than 750 days left as lame-duck-in-chief.

2. After today, Jeb Bush is no longer the governor of Florida and has a 28% favorability rating in the United States of America.


Monday, January 01, 2007

back to something I know

Happy Birthday to the National Aeronautics and Space Administration, also known as NASA, or by many idiots as "Nassau."

On this date in 1959 NASA was chartered by the government to lead the United States into space. They have had their ups and downs, but on the whole, the program has been one of the biggest successes of the U.S. government.

NASA now receives about fifteen and a half billion dollars a year from the government as its total operating budget.

The war in Iraq eats up that much money every two weeks.

Which one benefits America and humanity more?

Here's to friends and family...

Happy New Year to my best cyberfriends and their families--human and furry ones alike.

We're on our way to that better world now...keep the faith, babies.

(And that's not even the champagne talking...yet)

Better New Year

It's 2007 in the United States of America.

Let's all help make this a better year for our only home, planet Earth, and for our all-too-fallible species. Our kind is capable of such nobility of spirit and power of reason that we should never permit ourselves to not live up to our potential to shape the universe in positive ways rather than giving in to our petty little fears and vanities.

Be a good human. That's all it takes to change the world.