Wednesday, June 24, 2009

isn't it obvious?

The puzzling "hiking trip" that South Carolina governor Mark Sanford has putatively taken over the last several days has the media all aflutter with theories, or at least wild guesses as to where he has been and what he has actually been doing.

I think I can tell you.

Well, I can't tell you for sure what he has actually been up to during his mysterious absence, but I can tell you what the only story he can get away with is.


Governor Sanford is going to step before the cameras and announce that he had big decisions to make and needed to search his soul and that getting some private time to chat with god out in the great wilderness of America would be the right way to do it, and he will announce this with such overt, pious fervor that nobody will dare be rude enough to question it any further. The theocratic base of the republican party will swoon, the media will quietly accept it in order to not be accused of being hostile to religion, and Sanford will ooze piety like Jim Bakker reborn.

It's the only possible play.

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